the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
I went out in a blaze of glory. I failed the field sobriety test by saying ABCD FUCK YOU.
This is your liver's 7:15 wake up call. Mandatory margarita popsicles after work today. Rule #71: no excuses, play like a champ!
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
Randomize
