Me. At least after what I've been through.
So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
Randomize
