Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Randomize
