Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
Every morning i wake up and check his twitter like a horoscope
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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