everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
Who wears a wallet chain?!
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
You started laughing mid-cry and when I asked you said, "my tears taste like vodka."
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
Randomize
