Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
I'm like an air traffic controller of women. It's a very similar job. Well spaced and gentle landings are good. When they meet, it's bad. Explosions bad. Dying screaming burning children bad.
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??
....surprise!
Randomize
