you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
Thank God for cruise control and the Starbucks cup I had to puke in.
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
Randomize
