sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
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