I just woke up and found a naked man on my floor. Looks like Dad had a wild night of strip poker
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
I'm stoned and just shared 4 cookies with this chicks dog
They're raisins though so they're healthy. No worries.
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
Randomize
