when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
Randomize
