Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
Randomize
