She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
It's a "nonproductive" (vocab word) cough. It's like a constant tickle in my throat, like there's a little elf with feathers for feet going Gangnam style on my "uvula" (vocab word).
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
Randomize
