...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
I think i sorta joined a cult last night
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
I may have to marry her. She is smarter than me and has a six figure job and doesn't want to have kids. All I have to be is a trophy husband.
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
It's shark week go big or go home
I'm pretty sure that my eyebrow is going to be swollen from a sex injury tomorrow and possibly a black eye. If it forms that way it wiil be the second time. Different eyeball. Different decade.
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Randomize
