We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
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