I hate all girls vehemently.
All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawn mower thinking of you
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
You tried to put a condom on my dog, then he ate it.
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
I'm at his house right now making him pancakes to compensate for YOU not giving him a handjob last night. You're welcome.
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
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