do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
Randomize
