No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
Late night whataburger runs are great, except if you're the one that gets left black out drunk puking in the backyard drinking from the water hose
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
I literally have anal toys soaking in the bathroom sink and dinner on the stove. If that doesn't scream "domestic goddess", I don't know what the fuck does.
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
Keep your fingers crossed. If I get to go to a Stanley Cup game I'll give you the blowjob he deserves for taking me. Because hes definitely not gettin it.
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