plans for tonight: dress up like pirates, drink a bottle of mad dog and watch the sorostitues across the street get naked. and yes, the mad dog part is already in play. hurry the fuck up. i look like a loser doing this alone.
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
My wrist bandage is guacamole stained. What an accurate representation of my life as a whole
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
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