i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
I blacked out at work again... Except this time my boss watched me throw up by the bus stop and some woman let me sleep on her shoulder for an hour. Why does this keep happening?
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
You slapped the bar and yelled "daddys thirsty!" at the lady behind the bar
To be fair I was thirsty
When she told you not to yell you looked directly at me and screamed "Man, she sucks!"
Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
Things that have happened since you moved: Lemmy, Bowie, Snape, Prince, civility, democracy, Carrie Fisher, all dead. Record flooding down here. Twice. This is clearly your fault.
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
Randomize