If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
Why is there a cactus in the microwave?
Don't worry about it.
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
We bought a hamster while completely stoned and 2 hours later returned it because your mother wouldnt let you bring it in her house. You cried. a lot.
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
Blow job season was short but glorious.
Thanks for takin my cousin out last night, sorry I passed out so early
You kidding, the kids a legend. He literally killed a bottle of Jamison, made out with a girl AND her Mom at the bar, stole us slices of pizza and told the cab driver where to go in Spanish. He doesn't even live in the area. Can we keep him?
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
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