he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
this is getting really bad. i thought the chandelier in the dining room was one of those claws from the claw games in an arcade and i spent the past five minutes jumping left to right so the claw wouldn't grab me
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
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