So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
Dude there are two smokin hot chicks laying outside my apartment...I almost want to tell them theyre laying where I threw up last night
U should. Its a good ice breaker
Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
He got punched in the face, dropped his laptop down a flight of stairs, and broke his roommate's lava lamp, getting all the toxic lava goo everywhere. This is why we don't let him get drunk. And yet here we are.
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
Randomize
