I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
I deserve to be covered in dicks
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
how do you politely tell someone their toddler looks alarmingly similar to the berries and cream guy
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
Randomize
