Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
Randomize
