Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
Note to Self: No matter how horny, turned on or in the moment you are, never go down on your gf after she had soccer practice.
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
At 3:00am my whole house started smelling like cooking meat. I have no idea why she thought it was a good idea to crock-pot a WHOLE turkey that early in the morning.
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
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