I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
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