she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
The power of my boobs compel you
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
Randomize
