You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
she looked like the before picture.
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
Randomize
