I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
just had a woman ask me to donate my eggs so that her baby could look like me. don't know whether to get a restraining order or be flattered. thoughts?
i woke up half naked on someone's pool lounge chair in a house that i don't know, with someone's phone number scrawled on my stomach. why do i hang out with you again??
You just listed two reasons.
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
Randomize
