tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
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