im having a threesome with these popsicles
Almost accidentally stole a baby... explain later
I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
she texted me out of nowhere. and I wanted to get drunk. like I didn't even have her new number until 6 hours ago and bam we were rolling around drinking cotton candy vodka from the bottle she had stuffed in a boot
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
Randomize
