The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
Randomize
