Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
I don't text first unless I'm hammered...so ya I text first a lot
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
Randomize
