$35 all you can drink last night. Friend 1 woke up in a hotel lounge, friend 2 pissed himself and woke up wearing friend 1's spare pants, and my toilet indicates I threw up extensively.
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
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