like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
She just locked herself in the bedroom with an unopened bottle of wine and a steak knife. Unfortunately for her fingers, I stopped giving a fuck two hours ago.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
Hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking you had a pulse
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
Randomize
