i don't like sucking hair
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
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