RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
Randomize
