was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
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