So I thought I was slick leaving his room this morning all incognito. Little did I know I was wearing his football jersey with his name across the back... stilettos & my bra was left behind. never seeing that again
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
He tried to fight me not realizing that I work as a bouncer in the the same bar we were in. His night ended with him in handcuffs, missing teeth, PLUS I got his shots that he ordered since he didn't get to drink them.
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
Having sex with my girlfriend wearing my old Tom Brady jersey on the day he's freed is the closest I'll come to a 3way with Tom
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
Randomize
