New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
Randomize