so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
fuck he's narrating my life in a british voice make him stop im way too fucking high for this
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
She was giving me a handjob while I was wearing a sombrero with a beer in one hand and a hammer in the other.
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
dude pick up your phone
i cant. im high and theres a wild turkey in my backyard. wouldnt miss this moment for anything
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
Randomize
