i just identified you from a description of your pipe
why did your cousin post "out tonight" on facebook? doesn't he know it's only 1 in the afternoon?
shhh don't tell him. it's cloudy out and none of his clocks work
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
You used your chihuahua as a pillow screaming "HE'S A PILLOW AND A PET" and proceeded to puke in the dog bed
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
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