I just ate 3 burrito supremes and a crunchwrap...can't feel feet...I think I have diabetes
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
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