if i can run in heels then i can drive
The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
Randomize
