We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
tonight is going to be epic. can you pre-book an ambulance?
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
I found an industrial strength sharpie in the drawer so I started writing BONER JAM 2014 on everyone's foreheads so they kicked me out
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
Randomize
