i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
Randomize
