plz talk dirty to me
You know your life is awesome when sometimes you walk down the street eating a sandwich and you run into someone you had a threesome with. And not say hi.
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
smell my finger.
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
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