you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
I printed and framed a picture of a seagull shitting, and hung it in my house. I'm waiting to see how long it takes everyone to notice.
sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
I wish the guy in the stall next to me would stop moaning while taking a dump.
I wish you'd stop texting me from the toilet.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
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