We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
I need to write the inventor of adderall a thank you note stapled to a copy of my degree
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
Randomize
