belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
i swear every fucking time i plan a party, one of our "friends" holds their shit in all week just to punch one off into the master bathroom after i pass out. it's almost like that dump you would see in a port a potty.
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
So apparently my bro is going to make me fix his tattoo this trip... He sent me a pic of said tattoo. Tattoo is of a sperm, on his penis, which was in a woman's mouth... Wth
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